What I Want Is You
by Rhaegal Nymeria Stark
Summary: I, Jane Volturi am an immovable object. A weapon. My pleasure is another's torture. Hearing them scream is my pleasure. I have felt nothing for no one except my brother for centuries. So what is this new feeling in me? Who is SHE? Who is this Bella Swan?
1. Jane What I Want Is You

Title: **What I want is You**

Disclaimer: I do not own either Bella, Jane or Edward, this is all Stephanie Meyer's. I just own this insane idea

Author: Tsyber Rose 17

Rating: T

Genre: Errr….Romance? and suspense

Summary: I, Jane Volturi am an immovable element. I serve my master, the great Aro. The only pleasure I need is that that I get from the screams of my victims as I torture them with my powers. But what is this that I am feeling I have when I look at **her?** Who is this human girl that raises such desires in me? Who is this Bella Swan?

Note: I don't know what happened when I wrote this. I think I ate some bad, spoiled food when I did. Yeah, that explains it.

**What I want is You**

**Jane's POV:**

A weapon has no need for desires. A weapon has no need for wants or feelings. A weapon has no feelings or wants. A weapon should be nothing more than a weapon.

I am Jane Volturi. The most feared of the Vampire race. I am the proud favored weapon of my master Aro, the leader of the Volturi. I have existed for nearly 1600 years, 1612 if you include my pitiful human years.

My powers are only rivaled by that of my brother, Alec's. He is an antidote to my ability to cause pain; he makes you feel nothing.

Despite my lower rank to Aro and the other two great "fathers" of the Volturi, Caius and Marcus and Alec's power able to match my own, I am perhaps even more feared than my master is. The moment someone from our world hears my name they tremble in terror. My power makes even the strongest, brutal vampire criminals writhe in agony and beg for mercy.

I am Jane Volturi. I am a powerful weapon. I have no feelings. A weapon does not need feelings to stay powerful in a world where strength is necessary.

So then,……what is this change in me?

I, Jane Volturi am an immovable element. I serve my master, the great Aro. The only pleasure I need is that that I get from the screams of my victims as I torture them with my powers. But what is this that I am feeling I have when I look at **her?** Who is this human girl that raises such desires in me? Who is this Bella Swan?

I have never thought much about my existence. I've seen evils in both the human and the vampire world. The moment my brother and I were born, we were branded as witch children. Especially me.

What had I done? I was just born, and already the filthy humans of the world saw me as a monster, treated me like garbage. My brother had it pretty bad too. Insulted by the teacher, beaten by boys whose only sick pleasure was trying to elicit a reaction from him, that's all Alec had to look forwards to.

All this happened to us because our mother simply died giving birth to us.

The humans feared us because we "murdered" our mother.

Because of this, I came to see my feelings as a liability. Even before Aro changed Alec and myself into immortals I forced myself to feel almost nothing. I would be powerful and make all the villagers that mistreated the two of us pay one day; vulnerabilities were unacceptable.

Now, as the most treasured weapon of the Volturi, emotions are even more unforgivable.

I receive joy from the horrified screams of my victims. When I get angry, or when I just feel like it, I release my powers upon the fool that dares to defy the Volturi.

A coy smirk and a lifted eyebrow of amusement are the last things that my victim sees of me before going down on the floor rolling around, trying to stop the fire that I burn into them, even though of course they can't.

Nobody knows when I'm going to snap and send the fire through them. Then again, if I wasn't surrounded by such incompetent fools, then maybe it wouldn't happen as often.

But again, I am a weapon, I should not think of such things.

Yet I do. Especially now that I've seen……**her**…..

Where did she come from? Who in hells name is she? How has she brought such feelings from our kind? Why do I feel this way about her?

There are many things that I do not understand. But don't misunderstand me. Jane Volturi is no fool. I know what's what and who sees who as a possession or as a slave or a weapon. I understand emotions.

Or at least I thought I did.

I thought that I had felt all the hatred that I could offer when Alec and I butchered all the villagers that had tormented us our whole human lives after Aro changed me. I was sure that the hate I held for those villagers was enough to satiate me as I ripped my teeth into their flesh.

I was wrong. Very wrong.

The anger I unleashed towards that poor excuse of a vampire, Edward Cullen was proof enough of that.

Edward Cullen; curse him to all of hell. I can't even stand his name. I knew, when I saw how he looked at **her**, at that human girl, I knew that I could hate him more than anyone I had hated before.

The way he looked at her, as if she was his and his alone to love. How dare he?!

I made extra sure to torture him. To make that pitiful, weak, waste of immortality writhe against the stone ground of our castle as I used my power on him. What a befitting use of my powers; to torture the weak fool who continually tortures himself mentally.

Perhaps I did him a favor. If he wants to die so badly, he should just jump into fire next time.

And **her**, why was she so interested in him? I had seen the way several other vampires had looked at her. Certainly, by human standards she may not have appeared to be a beauty, but for vampires, who understand things far better than any narrow minded human does, they would have given very strange reactions to her that would be most unbefitting for our kind.

If I hadn't just been ordered to allow that pathetic waste of space, Edward to remain alive with his family, then perhaps I would have allowed myself to smile. Not my twisted ones like I usual had on my face, a real, humored smile.

Yes, Bella, such a fitting a name for one such as her. Despite her not being the usual beauty that every human would expect, she had a unique beauty that not even the sirens of the Greek myths could match.

The more I pictured that so called "plain" face in my mind, the harder it was to refuse that it was beautiful.

Why these feelings? Why am I feeling such things for this mere, pathetic human girl? What is this feeling in me, almost burning through my veins like the fire was when I was changed?

Such strange questions lurk in my mind and they won't leave no matter what I do.

Ever since Alec and I had escaped being burnt to a stake, thanks to Aro, I had forced a cold, unfeeling wall between myself and all those around me for the past 1600 years. There was no way that I was going to allow that icy wall down now. I was the best weapon there was.

A weapon has no use for conflicts.

But I do for some reason. I have destroyed my reason for being. My feelings for this one human…..

I don't know when it started. No that's not true, I do know when it started. It started the moment I laid eyes on that beautiful creature.

When that pathetic poor excuse for a vampire, Edward came to us the first time, begging for us to kill him, I was all too willing to do so. Aro had touched Edward, seeing all of his memories of Edward's little human, Aro simply stated that it would be a waste to kill him.

Me? I hadn't even seen the human girl yet and already I felt that the only waste would be allowing a whining, worthless animal like Edward to remain. He was good for nothing. What was he here for if not just to die?

He might as well not even have been born human, let alone being changed.

I knew what Edward's last name was when he came to us. Cullen. Carlisle's ward. I had heard about Carlisle from Aro many times. Carlisle was seen in very high regards by my master.

Supposedly his control when it came to human blood was phenomenal.

As for me, I saw no reason to praise that ability. What good was control with human blood when we're supposed to drink human blood? And Carlisle's a doctor? It goes completely against our nature!

I had left with Felix and Demetri when Aro ordered us to keep a watch on him. Like Felix, I was all too eager to carry out the punishment cast upon all criminals by the Volturi, however, just as Edward was about to step into the sunlight, a certain little overzealous human interrupted us.

The words will always remain burned in my memory. In fact that very moment will be burned in my memory forever.

"No, Edward, don't!" Was what she had screamed as she ran at him, at us in the dark to save her love.

As I remember that moment, I can practically visualize it in slow motion. Bella flinging herself into Edward's stone arms, almost toppling him over surprisingly, the look on Edward's face as if he had just seen God, and the kiss…..oh hell, let someone put my eyes out, the kiss!

The kiss had been a shock to see, even to one such as myself that had existed too long to appreciate any kind of sight, no matter how startling. Yet here was the kiss between a human and a vampire, something, whilst far from unheard of, was still a shock to lay eyes on.

As the two parted, I took my time to observe this human girl.

Though I did not show it at all, I was startled. This girl was beautiful. Her skin was as pale as porcelain, her hair was a thick, rich, shiny mahogany color and her eyes were the deepest brown.

I at first, told myself that she was nothing more than a mere human. After all, what else could she be? However, as we lead her and the pathetic vampire, and the pathetic vampire's sister, the future seer, Alice down to where our masters were, I noticed small things about her that I can't force from my mind.

The way she slightly licked her lips as she darts her eyes nervously from me to Felix to Demetiri, the way she walks, albeit clumsily, yet forcing herself to be determined through it all, the way she didn't seem to feel afraid as Felix glanced at her hungrily.

I, at the time decided that the reason why she wasn't afraid of Felix was because she was too stupid to have any self preservation. After all, she had come here, to the city where the very essence of the vampire race reigned. Yes, that's what I suspected. She had no sense at all.

But now I suspect that I might have been wrong.

When we finally were face to face with Aro, Marcus and Caius, the girl certainly showed fear, though she was trying to hide it. That foolish suicidal creature, pitiful as he was thought he could protect her from us.

I watched her and the vampire, half curious. In that moment, I saw things that I'd rather not. I observed her and noticed how much more beautiful she was to me by the second. I occasionally thought about taking a threatening step towards her, just to see how she'd react.

However, I got a much better reaction when I tortured her weak "lover," sending him screaming and writhing on the floor as I had so many others. Her reaction, like everything else concerning her, I'll never forget.

Her screeches and pleas of protest will remain with me always, even as I watch Edward's sister, Alice restrain her. Then came Aro's order; to see if my gift worked on her. Back then, I had no qualms about it. Even derived pleasure from the thought of forcing Edward to see his little precious human in such a torturous state, however, now…..well that's not important.

In any case, when I found out that my gift didn't work on her, I was needless to say, infuriated. My power had worked on everyone before, made them all suffer in ways beyond repair, yet no longer did it seem to. At least not on this mere human.

I was enraged and thought about killing her, of course my master controlled me from doing so. To take my anger out further, I tortured Edward again. What can I say, it's my drug, torturing.

Or at least it was. Now it seems I have a new addiction.

I think this in confirmation as I look back over my shoulder at where Bella Swan stands, almost smirking. I wonder, what would she think if she knew this?

As my master Aro offered a place for all three Edward, Alice and the human girl, Bella (You can imagine how much that displeased me at the time after finding out my power didn't work on her,) I took my time again to look over this fragile, weak creature that had caused us so much problems.

I startled myself as I found myself not just wondering what her blood tasted like, but wondering what it would feel like to have her in my arms just before I bit her. Naturally, I was immediately disgusted with myself for thinking such an endearment. I told myself again and again that any vampire would wonder that, after all, a vampire does need to touch their victim to drain them, right?

However, as I observed them further, seeing them reject Aro's offer, I saw Bella hesitate. For a moment, I wondered why. After all, hadn't we just tried to kill and torture her? But then I realized that she was actually _considering _joining us!

Now that was a surprise.

It may be just jumping to conclusions, and I'll never swear to it, but I could have sworn that she was considering joining our coven, despite how threatening we were.

Now I'm no Aro, I can't see every aspect or desire inside a human or vampire's mind just by touching them. Hell, even if I was, I probably wouldn't be able to read her mind anyway.

My master Aro wasn't able to.

So who knows what went on in that little human's head? At the time, I hadn't cared, I had thought her no more than an insignificant mortal. As Bella left with those two creatures that contradict our very nature, those two golden eyed freaks, I couldn't help but wonder what Bella would look like with red eyes.

I smirk again to myself at that thought. Yes, red would look so much better on her than gold.

As they left, and my brother and myself gorged ourselves on the tourists that Heidi had baited to come to us, our powerful jaws ripping into their arteries as they shrieked, another scream outside of the hall joined with our victims.

As we finished our meal, all of us were startled by the new scream that was outside of the hall. Why would any of our human staff scream? They knew what went on here. Unless….

I understood only a few seconds later, as did my fellow Volturi. It was Bella, the human girl. She had heard the screams of all of our victims and decided to join her voice with theirs in utter horror.

I had been startled once again, but uncaring. So the little human was horrified by our actions, so what? Now she knew just what she was dealing with.

The other Volturi in the room on the other hand, didn't look so uncaring.

Heidi, Renata and Chelsea shared an agonized look. Afton even flinched. Corin and Demetri simply sighed, an almost sadness in their tones.

Even my brother Alec, who had observed my fellow Volturi members along with me mumbled an explanation of their reactions to Bella screaming.

"It's because someone outside of our staff thinks of us as horrifying," He said to me gently, taking my hand carefully, "Hearing the terror of someone that we don't know is like making them look in the mirror. It makes them feel even more monstrous."

I scowled at this, sneering, "I should care, why, brother?" And I had stalked off with Alec sighing behind me.

It's true, whilst almost all of the Volturi are power-hungry, not all of us are monsters.

Well, the more gentle members of our coven aren't anyway.

In translation, Heidi, Marcus, Renata, Santiago, Demetri, Chelsea and Afton aren't.

They aren't like Alec and me.

Not all of them are the perfect weapon.

As I went back to my room for the day, filled up on the blood of a fairly tasty male, I once again found myself contemplating about that girl, Bella. Her screams were caught in my memory.

I couldn't help but wonder if she had seen the massacre earlier, would she still have considered joining us? Or would she be disgusted and terrified. If she **had** joined us, would she have joined in our meal? Furthermore, when she joined us in dining on our meal, how would she look with human blood coating her lips?

That question disturbed me. Why would I care how beautiful she'd look with the rouge life force of humans all over her? Why the hell would I care that the intoxicated look on her face as the liquid ran down her throat would make me freeze and watch her with such reverence? Why would I care that I imagined her as a goddess of death, smirking at me, wanting, coyly, and invitingly…….

God damn it!

I hissed to myself, smashing everything in my room, roaring to the rooftops. My animal roar, along with all the other noises I was making in the room, naturally drew some attention to me.

Aro immediately tried to calm me down, attempting to hold me gently in my rage.

However, a thought struck me; if Aro touched me, wouldn't he see….?

I backed away from him as he reached for me, quickly growling that I was okay, obviously not convincing him or any of the others who were watching me from the hallway.

I quickly, avoiding any physical contact with Aro, amended that I just needed to vent my frustration out because of the fact that my power didn't work on the human girl.

Aro and Alec seemed to accept that lie…..as did the others, but I wonder just how convinced they were that that was all that was bothering me.

So I was left alone with these terrible thoughts in my head. Constantly wondering about that human girl. The human girl in my mind, becoming a vampire, drinking human blood, getting drunk off of it……taunting me…….arousing me…..

A weapon is to have no feelings. If there is any soft yearning and wanting, the weapon is obsolete.

I know that feeling strange towards that human girl is not by any means abnormal for our kind. She clearly has the ability to cause some unrest in almost any vampire for some reason I have yet to understand. She has some strange power over our kind.

I know this from looking at Edward Cullen's eyes whenever he looks at her, and Alice Cullen's eyes when she looks at her. Hell, I've even seen some strange reactions with my own coven when it comes to her.

Felix, Renata, Heidi, Chelsea, they're all curious about her. And not because they want to drink her blood.

Well, Felix still was curious about her blood, but I could tell that his curiosity peaked as well when it came to the girl herself.

I won't even get into how fascinated Aro is with her.

I on the other hand, had no blasted idea what my feelings for her were. How could I feel for something so insignificant? This girl was a human, weak, frail, and worthless. I told myself that she was nothing more than food to us, and even if she was changed, she would still be insignificant compared to me. I have been in the Volturi for all of my immortality, why would this meager creature cause a change in me?

It was even worse when we Volturi heard about the mass killings in Seattle a few months later.

Seattle, wasn't that somewhat in the proximity of Forks?

Almost immediately as I understood that all these killings were done by newborns, therefore, they were being made by someone irresponsible, or rebellious, a new thought that was completely alien to me formulated in my brain at that information.

I couldn't believe what I had wondered, soon after hearing about the killings.

_Seattle, isn't it close to Forks? _I had thought to myself, _doesn't __**she **__live in Forks? What if the newborns come after her?_

That question in my mind struck me as I realized what exactly I had just thought. I don't think I need to tell you just how horrified I was at realizing what I had thought to myself.

My god, just how low had the mighty fallen?!

Did I actually have FEELINGS for this girl?!

The moment I had thought that and realized what I had wondered to myself, yet again, another scream was ripped from my throat in rage and shock. Once again, Aro, Alec and the others looked at me in concern as I destroyed several of the Volturi's possessions.

I even took my anger out on all three Demetri, Chelsea and Afton with my power, and besides Renata and Alec, they're the ones that offend me the least.

Aro had immediately disciplined me, scolding me most accurately. If it had been Caius I would have been beaten on the spot.

I was unable to stop thinking during that dark period as Aro considered what to do about these Newborns in Seattle. My thoughts lead me away from that terrible place where I had realized just how important Bella had become to me. My thoughts lead me back to the Volturi and Romanian war.

Back to Didyme.

Yes, Didyme; Marcus's deceased wife.

Didyme, she was the closest thing Alec and I had to a mother, given how we never knew our human mother. She had sung to me as I let her brush my hair, she had made me happy. I know what her gift was, and the fact that Alec and I were happy because of her had nothing to do with her gift, I assure you.

When…..during that other dark time, when Didyme had been destroyed by an unknown Romanian vampire during the war 1500 years ago, and....when…..when we Volturi had been forced to dispose of Didyme's burnt ashes, the agony that I had felt at her murder was unbearable.

I swore to my poor master that we'd avenge his sister's death. We would find who destroyed Didyme and make him pay. My own desire for vengeance had motivated this vow to Aro.

For some reason, Aro had looked uneasy by my promise.

I still wonder why.

I had sworn that I would find and kill the Romanian vampire that had murdered our Didyme, and even though I still don't know who did it, I swore to myself I would never again allow someone who I had…….loved to be harmed.

Now, that very same pain I felt at Didyme's murder came back and haunted me as images of these newborns in Seattle filled my mind, threatening the little human that I now yearned for so much.

Needless to say, I immediately volunteered to go along with Felix, Afton and Corin when Aro sent the patrol to go hunt and see about the newborns.

Aro, Caius and Marcus all clearly worried that given my mood which had been even more erratic than usual, however, they supported me and allowed me to go with the other three.

The journey from Italy to Forks was neither a short one, nor a pleasant one. Felix, Afton and Corin kept glancing at me as if they were worried that I might be set off at any moment. Which I was about to, if they didn't stop glancing at me, the idiots.

And the flight to America was even worse. All the staring in awe at the four strange creatures on the plain, all the weird stares and whispers, my god, it's annoying. Not to mention how fearful some people were just from a single glance at us.

Do you have any idea how hard it is to restrain yourself from feeding on someone when they're in such close proximity to you, when you drink from humans? I had to grunt at Felix twice as he leered at a young human girl's throat, inhaling her scent profoundly.

The human must have thought that he was a perverted creature.

Well, actually, she would have been very right about Felix, but that wasn't the reason why he was smelling her, of course.

Luckily we got out of the airport without incident. As we moved, our pitch black cloaks dragging along the ground as we ran from the airport to the forests of California, all the way up through the deserts. Let me tell you, it's hard to find a human that tastes good when they're in the desert and dehydrated. It's even hard to find a human in the desert period.

I believe Felix expressed his disdain for not finding human food in the desert, which lead to my mocking of him.

"_So then, Felix," _I had purred, smirking, _"Are you going to turn to vegetarianism like those Cullens and feed on a coyote?"_

I don't think I need to tell you how disgusted Felix's face looked at my teasing. Afton and Corin on the other hand seemed amused. Felix had scowled and he had proceeded to find a hitchhiker out on the road to feed on.

I guess containing my laughter at his look was impossible, given how it humored me and filled me with such perverse amusement.

We had proceeded to Seattle, or more specifically, Forks, given we had heard the army of newborns were traveling from that city to that accursed boring town….accursed town where the human being that was becoming my most precious reason for existing resided.

Damn it all!

Damn that human.

Damn that beautiful goddess that should be by my side, not **his.**

I had scowled at this. It seemed as we entered Forks that I had long since forgotten my ability to pretend that I felt nothing for that human. I was a weapon, yet I felt what I shouldn't have. I craved that human girl. I wanted to see her face, watch her reactions, learn more about her.

Lord knows that I was getting weird looks from Felix, Afton and Corin as I growled about her and the Cullens' interaction with each other.

I'm surprised I haven't heard any teasing from them yet.

Of course, I would just send a bolt of agony through them if they even dared; that would shut them up.

We had gotten to a meadow where we heard sounds that we could only compare to the horrific roars that we had heard from our Romanian enemies long ago. Back when our kingdom had almost fallen, back when Didyme had been murdered by some random Romanian vampire.

But these roars sounded even more feral than any Romanian.

Felix, Afton, Corin and I approached the meadow where we saw fires blazing and saw erratic movements. Furthermore, we saw a very bizarre, shocking sight.

We saw dozens of newborns roaring and snarling, and being ripped apart by other figures, more specifically, by the Cullens. And by something else…..something that looked really furry.

Yeah, something furry with sharp teeth. The creatures that were helping the Cullens looked like wolves! But it couldn't be. Here?!

Caius would not be happy about this. I had heard plenty of horror stories of what Caius had done to the werewolf species; nearly driving them to extinction, murdering them anywhere he could.

Seeing wolves here, he'll show a temper that the whole coven will remember for a while.

As the battle continued, I watched as many newborns were burnt and destroyed, all the while, my blood red eyes scanned the field, almost panicking for a moment because I couldn't see my Bell……couldn't see Bella.

Before I could mumble any excuse, Felix, who had been noticing how I was looking around gestured to a large oak tree as he grunted, _"She's over there, Jane."_

I would have asked what Felix was talking about in order to fool him, had I not immediately looked at where he was pointing and saw the infuriating, beautiful reason for my conflicts standing right there with a protective circle around her of both wolves and vampires.

Bella…..gods…there she was.

She stood there, clearly afraid; I imagine she would be, given how I suspect that several of those newborns wanted her. I scowl at that thought. They wouldn't have her, no matter how hard they tried. They would not taste her precious blood.

I guess the others were thinking different thoughts at the time, because I heard Afton say quietly under his breath, _"She's still human. That's not good. Caius and Aro aren't going to like that."_

I was unable to help but agree. This was not good. None of the Volturi would be too happy about this.

As we watched, we saw a beautiful vampire approach who had fiery red hair in curls and was next to a male closing in on them.

The other three and I listened in to the conversation taking place.

I heard that infuriating, insignificant vampire say coolly, _"Victoria, you may never get another chance like this. Stay for a little while."_

I had smirked. I knew what Edward was doing. All vampires do that to both humans and vampires. It's a seductive, yet dangerously enticing way to convince someone. I've done it a few times to some adult vampires in order to lead them to their doom.

We continually watched. We didn't interfere, because all four of us remembered the order, the exact order that Aro had given us. I still remember his exact words even to this day.

"_Remember, my dear ones," _Aro had said almost lovingly, _"do not interfere until the battle is over. With any luck, if the newborns are after the Cullens, they will decrease the Cullens' numbers."_

The reason why I will always remember what Aro said was because we were all so shocked at this instruction. Wasn't Aro fond of the Cullens? Especially Carlisle?

Seeing our looks, Aro had smiled playfully as he continued, almost as if he was talking about new carpets for our stone floors. I'll admit, that's kind of annoying.

Aro stated, smiling, _"The Cullens are a very talented coven. A mind reader, that empath that was in the southern wars, and of course, little Alice; the future seer, and who knows what kind of gift Bella will have. However, at some point, they may become a threat to our own coven. I feel that our little household would be less threatened if there were less of them."_

Basically, in translation, we were to leave some of the Cullens to be destroyed. Lessen their numbers indirectly. That was alright with me. So long as that goddess wasn't touched….

After several swipes and scuffles, the fiery red-haired woman was ripped apart, as was the very young looking male vampire. We watched several plumes of gray-blue smoke in the air. I suspect more than twelve had once existed before this night.

It seemed like only one remained. A snarling young woman staring at……my…human.

I still growl in rage to this day at the thought and at the hunger in her eyes.

That's when the four of us decided to make our entrance.

As we approached, Afton mumbled to me, _"Jane, keep your priorities straight, okay? Don't worry, she's not in danger anymore."_

If I had had blood, I swear that it would have frozen. One of my fellow Volturi knowing about my feelings, even if it was one as obnoxious as Felix was one thing, several of them knowing on the other hand…..

Scowling back at the three males, I hissed, _"Keep your mouth shut, Afton, unless you want me to use my power on you. You keep your priorities straight, alright? Don't forget about Edward Cullen's gift. Put something distracting in your minds so that he can't pick it up."_

Needless to say, I had been right. There was Edward Cullen to think about in regards to detecting what I felt and what Felix, Afton and Corin had just learned. We had started to approach, myself being first as I let out a dead, _"mmh." _and of course, as if on cue, the bastard Edward kept Bella behind him protectively. Bella's reaction was more than memorable; squinting through the smoke to see the four of us dressed in our cloaks and immediately squeezing closer to him fearfully.

I felt rage boiling up in me. It was a good thing I didn't have blood in my veins anymore, otherwise I'd have bitten my lip so hard in anger that I'd bleed. The sight of her coming closer to that…that pitiful…..when I think about it now, I must have been growling in frustration, because only a few seconds later, Afton placed a hand on my shoulder.

"_Shh, Jane," _Afton whispered gently, _"Shh. I see her with him just as well as you can. I understand. But that's enough, little sister. We're approaching now."_

I would forgive him for calling me, "little sister" in public later, right now we needed to attend to the last bit of business here.

Coming into all of their views, Felix and I came forwards whilst Afton and Corin stayed behind. All of the Cullens and Bella stiffened.

"_Welcome, Jane," _Edward had said, and instantly I felt my desire to send my gift at him, sending that all too perfect velvety voice into raggedy screeches of pain.

The cowl of my hood covered most of my face, however I could see Bella well enough, however, I reminded myself of Edward and quickly forced other things to the front of my mind so that all Edward would read from my mind was what I wanted him to read.

I noticed out of the corner of my eye Felix looking at Bella from under his hood, smiling and winking at her. I thought about growling at this action of more or less flirting with what was **mine**, however, I kept in mind that Edward was right there, and forced the thoughts of Aro's orders into my mind instead for him to read.

To distract myself, I looked across the field at the newborn woman who had her head in her hands.

I spoke my thoughts exactly. _"I don't understand." _I had told the Cullen coven, which was true; I hadn't understood at all. Even with those wolf beasts, how could the coven take down these ferocious newborns?

Then again, I had heard that that one of the Cullen vampires, Jasper had been in the southern wars, perhaps his expertise had been of use here.

Almost as soon as I stated it, the Cullens proceeded to tell me, or give me a short version of what had happened here. They told me about the fiery haired one, Victoria, and the male she had used, Riley, who I was guessing was the young male that the brown colored wolf had destroyed. Shockingly, I had gotten through all of that without looking at Bella.

And successful as well with keeping my many distractions in my mind so Edward wouldn't see my true thoughts.

Finally, I turned my attention to the female newborn, who according to the Cullens, had surrendered.

"_What is your name?" _I had asked her coldly. The result was only a an angry, yet fearful glare. I had restrained a smirk. Well she asked for it. Since she wasn't answering me when she was required to….

The next thing Bella and the Cullens knew, the woman was on the ground screaming. I restrained a grin this time as I sent my power at her, but then noticed that Bella was looking away, instead, looking at Edward. I sent a deeper growl through my throat and made my attack on the girl more intense before subsiding.

"_Your name." _I demanded again so that I was distracted from the pain of watching her with **him.**

Learning soon after that the girl's name was Bree, I decided to torture her again, smiling once more. This time, I heard Bella hold her breathe and again concentrate on Edward.

Why look at such a fool when she could be rewarded with the sight of what my power could do?

Why did she look at the weakling that abandoned her, when she could look at me and see the power that could be **hers **to command if she would just accept me. All she'd have to do was tell me what it was she wanted me to do and I would do it. Yet of course, because of her contact with these abominations of vampires, the Cullens, she had it completely backwards of what a vampire was.

I was the epitome of what a vampire was supposed to be. Surely she knew she couldn't get from Edward what she could get from me.

"_She'll tell you anything you want to know," _Edward had seethed, _"You don't have to do that."_

"_Oh, I know," _I had answered coyly, grinning again at Edward before turning back to Bree, asking, _"Is this story true? Were there twenty of you?"_

Bree, obviously afraid of the consequences if she didn't answer correctly, shuddered and breathed out, panting, _"Nineteen or twenty, I don't know!" _She continued to babble the story as I asked what happened with Riley, finally she babbled out that the head of the Cullen family, Carlisle had promised not to hurt her if she stopped fighting.

That thought really just made me laugh. Well it was time for this girl to have a rude awakening.

However, there was one thing that was bothering me before we dealt out justice; why had the newborns been after Bella?

"_-how was the girl the key?" _I asked, glancing at the still frightened Bella, not letting my hurt thoughts reach Edward's tiny mind.

"_Victoria had a grudge against Bella." _The tiny minded vampire stated, ignoring my look. Despite my new protectiveness over Bella, I couldn't help but burst out laughing, almost in a childlike way as I heard that. Ah, I hadn't laughed like that since I was a human five-year-old, playing with Alec.

So, yet again there was another vampire that reacted strangely with my Bella. Interesting.

"_This one seems to bring out bizarrely strong reactions in our kind."_ I stated, which was an understatement. Of course, I was only speaking from personal experience. After all, she had brought reactions from me, me the best weapon in vampire history.

If she could get a reaction from Jane Volturi, then the rest of the Vampire population would be easy prey for this little siren.

I looked at her, smiling, and immediately I forced myself to think that I was going to use my gift on her to fool Edward. Again, easy. Edward really is an idiot, you know. Of course, he believed my thoughts, even though I wasn't using my gift at all. I was only holding thoughts of my torture to fool him.

My farce got the result that I had wanted.

"_Would you please not do that?" _Edward had asked, annoyance heavy in his tone.

I giggle, _"Just checking." _And I see Bella shudder. For some reason, the thought of Bella believing that I would still try to torture her hurt. Again, I pushed those thoughts away, since Edward was still watching.

"_Felix." _I said, bored. He approached. He knew what I wanted.

The Cullens tried to reason with me, however, I had made up my mind. I was still angry about my feelings towards Bella and that these newborns had tried to hurt her. All of them would perish, including this one.

Oh yeah, and I also thought of one other thing while I was there. I had turned back to Bella, if only to look at her face again as I stated, finishing my dark speech, _"Which reminds me…Caius will be __**so **__interested to hear that you're still human, Bella. Perhaps he'll decide to visit." _

"_The date is set." _The one called Alice had stated, speaking for once, _"Perhaps we'll visit you in a few months." _

At hearing this, a part of me felt disappointed. At first I wasn't sure about why, but I believe the reason now is that I had wanted to be the one to change Bella into a vampire.

The process of changing someone into a vampire is sometimes very intense, and so the relationship between a vampire and his or her sire can be very close during that time. I wanted to be the one to show Bella that bond.

In my conflicted mood between anger and pleasure, I shrugged my shoulders to make myself look indifferent and called for Felix again. Once again, his huge frame moved into action.

I heard Edward hiss to Bella, _"Don't watch."_

I smirked in amusement. Not watching wouldn't help. She'd still hear the snapping and twisting of Bree's bones and her final shriek as the flames consumed her.

Those very sounds were what the choir of pleasurable noises that my ears were rewarded with as Felix destroyed Bree. Bella turned away as this happened, almost cringing into Edward now as her eyes were squeezed shut. I think actually she might have fainted.

I noticed her go limp in Edward's grasp as I walked away with Afton and Corin, Felix joined us after he finished. I had narrowed my eyes as I thought of her fainting. Really, now, had there really been any reason for her to faint?

_(This is our world, Bella,) _I had thought to myself as the four of us walked, _(This is the world you are going to join soon. You need to see the reality. This is the protection I am willing to grant you, if you accept us as your family instead of the Cullens.)_

The four of us went back through California to the airport and went through the whole thing all over again. During some of that time, Felix, Afton and Corin had some interesting things to say.

"_I can't say that I'm not impressed, Jane," _Corin had said, smirking, _"You? Feeling these things for a human? Then again, can't say I blame you. She is very intriguing."_

I had scowled at his words and his smirking face, though whether I wanted to admit it or not, I was pleased to know that the three of them didn't think lowly of me, having feelings for a mere human.

Even Felix added his "two cents" in as the humans say.

"_And she isn't affected by Jane's power," _the big lug said, smirking, _"So when Bella gets mad at Jane, she can yell at her without getting hurt."_

I almost whirled on Felix when he said that, only to have all three of the males burst out laughing at that thought. Obviously the thought of someone besides Aro, Caius, Marcus and Alec being able to yell at me and not get the brunt of my power was amusing for them.

"_We'll see how funny it is when we get back and I use my power on all three of you." _I had growled under my breath as they laughed.

When we got back, Felix told Aro what happened, however, Aro did his usual inspection, which was touching Felix's hand to get his memories to see what happened. This time, I felt the terrible sense of dread as I watched. There was no getting out of it now. Felix knew about my feelings for Bella, now Aro would know.

As I watched Aro's face, grabbing Afton's wrist, digging my nails into his marble flesh, he patted my arm with his other hand.

"_He'll understand, Jane," _Afton whispered, _"Who knows feelings and memories better than Aro does, after all?" _

Aro's face seemed to take on several emotions at once; Extreme interest, worry, fascination and finally amazement. The last emotion was fixed on his face as he looked up at me and his eyes locked with mine in complete shock. I've never ever imagined my master holding such a look.

I guessed at that moment that the "cat was out of the bag" once again, as the humans say.

"_Is this why you have not let me touch you since Edward Cullen came to us?" _Aro had asked me, letting everyone hear his realization, _"You did not want me to know this?" _

I was at a loss, my face expressionless. I was a weapon, I did not know how to comprehend someone like Aro understanding what I knew about my own feelings.

And then came the infamous "talk" from Aro.

"_Now you know not to be rude when we see her again, don't you? And I know that compliments aren't something you enjoy giving, Jane, but you may want to mention her beauty next time." _Was one of the MANY things he said later that night when he found out…much to Felix and Alec's amusement.

God, Aro, that blasted twit.

He can talk about things so joyfully, when I'm in such a bad mood. Needless to say, all of the other Volturi stared, some with amusement, some with disbelief, some who just had no idea what to do.

I couldn't blame those of them that were shocked. After all; me, Jane Volturi, in love?! I could only imagine what they all thought. Then again, I couldn't help but wonder if Renata, Heidi and Chelsea were hopeful for me. The three of them did worry about me from time to time.

"_Tell me, Jane,"_ Aro said, his once again, all too gay voice danced against my ears, _"Perhaps there's a present you would like to send to her, or a note?" _

Oh god! Did Aro ever shut up about this? I'm very happy that I can't blush anymore. Thinking about Bella so much would have made me blush horribly if Aro kept asking me. Lord knows that once Felix, Alec and the others tease me, it's all over.

However, our so called jovial moods were interrupted by some rather disturbing news. Disturbing for me anyway. Edward and Bella were getting married.

I felt like a horrific bomb powered with flames and infernos had hit the castle with me right where it had landed, incinerating me. Or at least I wished that that was what happened.

It would have been better than what I felt at that moment. Bella…..getting married to that….that….pathetic, despicable creature?!

When Demetri had come back to Volterra from Forks, delivering the message that he had gotten when he had traveled there, I was unable to stop myself upon hearing the news. Poor Demetri, because of my rage, he got an unfair, large dose of my gift, the next thing everyone knew, I hit him to the floor, forcing him to scream to the high heavens.

As Alec and Aro managed to calm me down, I once again stormed to my room, destroying all the possessions lining the halls. Ignoring Caius's grumbles of my disobedience along with everything else.

I scowled at the walls as I walked to my room, ignoring Chelsea and Afton worrying about replacing the possessions I had broken. Athenodora and Sulpicia can bitch at me later if they want.

Once I was in my room, I plopped down on my back on my bed. Honestly, I don't know why Aro insisted me having a bed in my room. It's not like I'm going to sleep on it!

As I lay down on the bed, of course not going to sleep, my thoughts again brought me back to Didyme, the closest thing either Alec or myself had as a mother. Athenodora and Sulpicia are alright, but they're the farthest things from mothers.

Sulpicia's far too cold and power-hungry, and Athenodora's too passive.

I had loved Didyme, as had Alec and Marcus. Hell, even Felix loved Didyme, and he wasn't even 400 years old, he had never met Didyme. He loved her just by the description that Aro had given him once and already he seemed fond of her memory.

Right now, in present day, I look over at the line of witnesses and at Bella and Edward and that….creature giggling in their arms and wonder if Bella feels the same love for that child vampire that Didyme felt for Alec and myself.

That child that Bella is holding…..what was her name again? Renas…..Renee…, hell what was it?

Renesmee, that was it! Did Bella love her and Edward's Renesmee as much as Didyme loved Alec and myself?

Oh well.

Back to back then, back to when I had just learned the impossibly disgusting news of Edward and Bella's marriage, my mind wandered back to when Marcus had given Didyme a necklace of sorts that I suppose was very large and showy. After Didyme had been murdered in the Romanian wars, Marcus had given it to me.

I scrambled over to a silver and black chest I kept in the corner of my room, quickly unlocking it and retrieving the necklace from the stone black bottom of the chest.

As I strung my fingers through the thick gold chain of the necklace, I looked at the golf ball-sized diamond. As I looked at it, I remembered what Aro had asked me; if I wanted to send anything as a gift to Bella.

Yes. Yes, I did.

"_Master!" _I had called to Aro as I came back down the stairs with the necklace. Whether Bella was to be changed by Edward by that point or not, I had decided to send this as a gift….that was…if Marcus allowed it.

I approached all three of the brothers on their thrones, holding the necklace to myself as I scowled at them.

Seeing the necklace, Marcus flinched, however said nothing. Aro, upon seeing what I held, smiled as if he understood what I was thinking, without touching me and reading my mind.

Caius just looked perplexed.

"_I see!" _Aro had exclaimed, clapping his hands together, pleased, _"So you wish to send your beloved Bella that necklace for a present! How lovely, Jane!"_

Once again, I was eternally grateful that I couldn't blush anymore. Aro truly is a frustrating being. No matter what, he always has a tendency of making you feel aggravated at his jovial or fake jovial looks and chuckles.

I, however, wasn't sure I had wanted Bella to know that I was the one to send it. Hence my next statement to Aro.

"_Perhaps you could send it as a wedding gift to Bella, in hopes of prompting the Cullens to change her faster." _I had said, forcing myself to remain indifferent.

The halls had remained silent at that excuse. Aro had lifted his eyebrows at this.

"_You know," _he had said, _"Jane, it doesn't help that you don't admit to yourself what it is you want."_

I hadn't answered him. I had had too much on my mind when I made that request.

Soon, after our little "exchange," Aro had sent the necklace that Marcus had given me to Bella and Edward. Marcus raised no questions or protests to this. I thought about asking him what he had thought, however I was too afraid to know what it was on his mind.

Too afraid that it would lead back to Didyme. A subject I was afraid of discussing.

Once Aro had sent the necklace, with a note attached, I told myself that everything was fine. Bella had been granted a most beautiful gift, and she had gotten it most likely thinking that it was from Aro, not me.

That was the way I wanted it.

All seemed to be right with the vampire world. I was able to hold back my rage from finding out that Bella and Edward had married with the satisfaction that at least she had something from me, even if she didn't know it was meant from me.

So everything seemed fine…until a few months later when Irina of the Denali coven came before us.

Irina seemed terrified, shocked and desperate as she spoke to us. What she claimed was preposterous enough for me to use my gift on her for a week.

She swore that the Cullens had created an immortal child.

Once again, because of the Cullen coven, our whole entire household was silent for almost seven minutes. Every one of us looked at each other in disbelief. Had the Cullens really sunk so low?

Whispers ran throughout the coven. Renata gasped and shrank deeper into our master's side in fear and shock. Chelsea looked horrified. Heidi shook her head, mumbling 'no, no, no' again and again. Demetri, Corin, Afton and Santiago all looked on the defensive. Felix just looked curious. Alec and I looked at one another in shock.

Alec and I had been around when they had finished off every immortal child there was. A part of me had even thanked whatever being there was that had allowed me and Alec to grow to be twelve and not be counted as immortal children.

For the fate that awaited the immortal children was a grim one.

However, some of us, who knew just how dangerous the Cullens may come to be one day, were relieved. This was an excuse to attack.

I on the other hand, had my own personal worries. And the rest of the coven knew it now.

Felix even approached me before we started traveling to go the Cullen home to talk to me about it.

"_So, how do you feel about your girl having an immortal child, Jane?" _He asked, smirking, _"Now at least we have an excuse to destroy them. We'll bring Bella back here as one of our guards, so things will turn out for the best anyway."_

Snarling, I hit him with my gift twice, sending him screaming to the ground.

His screams obviously caught some attention.

"_Jane!" _Aro yelled from the main room, _"We have enough to worry about right now. Do not use your gift when we have more pressing matters at hand. Felix, don't provoke her." _

I growled and released Felix from my torturous hold. Getting up and retreating, Felix had smirked back at me one time before heading back to the main hall.

I swear, the rest of the Volturi wants me to destroy them.

When we came up with a plan, we had heard rather interesting rumors from other vampires; apparently the Cullen coven was calling in an army to overthrow the Volturi. I only go by what I heard. I could only scoff as I heard that. The Volturi, being overthrown? What a ridiculous idea.

However, even more torturous thoughts had entered my dark mind.

This immortal child, did Bella have anything to do with its existence? Had she asked Edward to change the child? Or had she changed the child herself?

Truly, Edward would have done anything to make her happy, correct? Could he have abducted the child Irina claimed to have seen and changed it so that Bella could have a child?

Or was Bella responsible for the making of this kid?

I remembered all of those that had been destroyed along with the Immortal Children for making the kids into vampires…..would I be able to exist with myself, knowing that I had destroyed Bella, the woman that I loved for breaking the law?

For eternity? Could I exist with myself knowing that I had destroyed the child that was hers now, knowing that it would kill her? How much pain would Bella be in once the child that she most likely loved by now was destroyed?

A part of me feared what we would find on that lawn of the Cullen home when we were to go there. Yes, me, Jane Volturi, terrified for once of what was to come. Not terrified for my own safety for once but afraid for my Bella's sanity and safety.

Would she still exist after we came for her and the child?

If so, how much of her sanity would remain after my family destroyed hers?

I swear that my body felt even lower in temperature than it had in 400 years as these thoughts ran amuck through my mind. Alec of course noticed how distraught I was and came to my aid.

"_Jane," _He said to me, his voice once again, a numb antidote to my torture and rage, _"Don't think about it. It will only make things worse when we set off. You think about it too much now you won't be able to do anything except panic."_

When I had heard that, watching such understanding on my brother's face, I really let my guard down for once.

"_Alec," _I found myself able to breath, _"I don't know what to do. Hell, we were there when the immortal children were wiped out. We saw how the vampires that made the immortal children were after their immortal children were destroyed. They were in ruin. How am I supposed to react to Bella losing her own immortal child now?" _

Alec had been shocked when I had stated this to say the least. He stared at me for a few moments. I couldn't blame him. I hadn't spoken this deeply and emotionally since we were first changed into vampires. The fear and anger I had felt at the time seemed to be here with me also when I imagined Bella with an immortal child.

It seemed that fears that I had suppressed since I was only a newborn had resurfaced.

I was as conflicted and in pain and on the verge of destroying someone simply because I was distraught, the same way I had been when I had first been changed.

I scowled at the wall, not wanting to think about anything as I heard Aro, Caius and Marcus plan out our attack. As the time went by we heard more and more rumors. Presumably other vampires from all over the world were coming to join the Cullens.

I overheard something about two surviving Romanians, and something else about a coven from Egypt. It didn't matter, I knew. We'd stop them. We would be an unstoppable force, destroying everything in our path; for every one of the Volturi guard as I understood it was coming.

Even the remaining wives; Athenodora and Sulpicia.

The doors to our castle were wide open then, letting every one of us out.

Demetri lead the way, for he was our tracker.

Then Felix, Corin, Santiago and Afton lead after that, then Alec and myself flanked Marcus on each side as the three of us exited, Aro and Caius left soon afterwards, Renata close behind our master as we moved. Chelsea, Heidi, Rufus, Malcolm and Gregory followed soon after. Then Jack, Daniel, Tomas, Robert, Aleena and Rachel followed soon afterwards, guarding Athenodora. Alexander, Bianca, Frederick, Leon, Kyle, Zach and Oliver filed out next, guarding Sulpicia.

As we moved, needless to say attracting attention to us wherever we went, we found ourselves in deep conversation. Some of the others; Frederick, Oliver and Aleena were discussing what they should do. They clearly weren't expecting this "immortal child" nonsense again.

Santiago, as we walked near each other, whispered to me quietly, _"Jane, do you think you'll be able to concentrate with Bella there?" _

My eyes immediately slanted at him threateningly. My rage came back fast and unhappy.

I would have reacted, had it not been for Marcus's hand on my shoulder, restraining me.

Again, we were able to get to America and to Forks without incident, aside from the stares that my coven gave me as we moved. However, when we were going through the town called "Port Angeles" to get there, Felix of course, said something he shouldn't have.

Turning his head to us, smirking at me, he said, clearly not thinking of the consequences as he had spoken, _"So, given that Bella might have been responsible for this immortal kid's existence, we should capture her….so Jane, mind sharing your mate?" _The bastard had been grinning when he had asked me, making me snap this time.

Suddenly, almost everyone in the small town were looking at us as they heard me roar in rage and as they heard Felix scream, now writhing against the road as I tortured him, grinning insanely.

"_So, Felix," _I had cackled, ignoring Aro's pleas, _"What's the last thing you want us to hear from you before I destroy you? Bella is MINE!" _

By that point, it was completely clear what my feelings were, and now every one of the Volturi had heard it. In that moment when I had announced my possessiveness, announced who it was that I desired for my mate, I had put my dignity on the chopping block in front of my fellow Volturi, who all knew me as a heartless, merciless, evil creature that indulged in the pain of others.

And here I was, merciless Jane, infatuated with and as far as I could tell, irreversibly in love with Bella, a newborn. A newborn that had broken the law and had an immortal child.

Robert had breathed, _"You're in love with her. You're putting a mate-claim on her? All vampires know what that means." _

I scowled, however kept my thoughts to myself. I knew what vampires were like when it came to mates just like everyone here knew. When vampires become mates, they're very possessive of each other. I think I already had that part covered, whether Bella felt the same way or not.

For the rest of the trip, none of us dared say anything. Lord knows we wouldn't say anything when we came into view of the Cullen property. We marched over through the forest till we got to the property.

There they were.

The "army" that Carlisle had summoned to protect his family and immortal child. There had to have been at least 28, maybe 30 of them as well as the Cullens. Not to mention the furry wolf protectors surrounding them.

So, this was indeed a rebellion. Dozens of vampires from everywhere, including the Cullen family, an immortal child and werewolves. This was the army that Carlisle had for us.

I cared nothing for the political talks between Carlisle, Aro and Caius. I was too busy looking at the new addition to the Cullen family.

She was beautiful. Mind you, I didn't expect otherwise, but still, I was frozen in my spot as I caught view of her. There she was, her mahogany colored hair even shinier and thicker than before, her skin now colored pearly, her face even more uniquely beautiful than before, and her eyes…….well I suppose I shouldn't have been surprised when I saw her eyes. After all, she had been with the Vegetarian freaks for a few months now, right? They of course, made her get used to their diet.

Her eyes were red, but only to an extent. Her eyes were half gold, half red. She still looked like a newborn to an extent.

I understood why her eyes were mostly gold, yet I felt immensely disappointed. I had always fantasized what she would look like with red eyes. Those haunting, bloody crimson eyes burning into me, teasing me to come closer……she would have looked better with red eyes than gold.

What teased me worse was the trinket that Bella was wearing around her neck. You guessed it; it was that necklace that I had asked Aro to send to her. Didyme's necklace. It's diamond shined, making me glare at it as it taunted me like Bella's eyes did.

And of course, there **he** was, Edward, his arms around Bella's waist protectively. I seethed to myself, my eyes fixed to the couple, ignoring the deadly circle of vampires around them. Alec at some point held my hand to calm me.

Good old Alec. If it wasn't for him I'd be even more insane than I already was. He accepted my feelings no matter what.

I noticed that there were two very dangerous looking vampire women around Bella. They were wearing animal skins and had tanned skin. Another near her was a young looking vampire male that also had tan skin and red eyes. Those women I believe were the amazons. Who was the young boy? He looked at least only one or two years older than when Alec and I had been changed.

Ah, and there were the two remaining Romanians, what were their names again? I think I remember one of them being named Vladimir…..and the other…..oh, right, Stefan.

I definitely remember him. He almost got me, and he would have as well if Alec and Didyme hadn't rescued me.

Again, good thing Alec was here. He kept me from the grim memories.

The head of the family, Carlisle stepped forwards. He and my master conversed for at least seven minutes. During that time, I really wanted to kill something. Preferably someone. Preferably someone who could read minds, had reddish hair and was part of the Cullen coven.

In translation: Edward Cullen.

Finally, Aro said that he wanted to see the child. I froze in my spot. So we'd be laying eyes on this abomination soon?

As Aro approached the Cullen home, I stiffened and growled, despite Alec's presence. I did not like the idea of Aro going near the battleground where at least 30 something vampires, an immortal child, and a bunch of werewolves. He easily could have been ripped apart under three seconds. I tensed and tensed as I watched, for once, my gaze being ripped away from Bella.

I watched Aro enter the house, Felix and Demetri in tow of him.

I heard Felix and Bella conversing surprisingly.

I had listened closely, wanting to make sure that fool didn't say anything too vulgar to Bella.

"_Hello again." _Felix had said, grinning cockily at her.

I saw a wry smile on Bella's lips as she said back, _"Hey, Felix." _

Felix had chuckled, _"You look good. Immortality suits you."_

"_Thanks so much." _Bella had stated back, sarcasm clear in her tone. I couldn't help but grin at the tone in her voice. That was the Bella I loved so much.

Felix had continued, smirking, _"You're welcome. It's too bad…"_

He had deliberately trailed off, but both Bella and myself knew very well what he was implying, and I had to restrain my growl as I was pretty sure I could imagine the rest of it.

"_Yes, too bad, isn't it?" _Bella had said again, once more rather in an ironic tone.

I tensed at hearing this. I knew Felix well enough to know that he wasn't threatening her, just toying. He knew me too well, knew that if he threatened what was mine, he would pay.

Aro seemed to want to add something as well as he spoke, once more making my thoughts more hectic when it came to Bella, _"In truth, young Bella, immortality does become you most extraordinarily. It is as if you were designed for this life."_

Bella seemed to nod in acceptance to his words.

Aro had continued, looking at the necklace around her pale throat, _"You liked my gift?"_

"_It's beautiful and very, very generous of you. Thank you. I probably should have sent a note." _Bella had said, obviously embarrassed at not showing the right amount of gratitude and for a moment I missed the blushes that I heard the large male Emmett laugh about seeing.

"_It's just a little something I had lying around. I thought it might compliment your new face, and so it does." _Aro continued his shameless, wondrous compliments, and I couldn't help but hiss at him showing MY Bella such compliments.

Aro entered, and next we heard the sounds from inside. Indeed, it seemed that Aro was having contact with the immortal child. Soon, I heard my master's words of shock and praise at whatever he had been shown by this new abomination.

I didn't like whatever it was that his words were implying.

I then heard Edward's irritating voice, "Don't even think it." I then, after a few moments heard Edward say, "He's intrigued about the idea of……guard dogs."

Literally only one second later, we all heard a chorus of snarls and roars in rage from the werewolves surrounding the house.

Can't say I wasn't grateful to them for their reaction. I wasn't eager either of the idea of sharing the castle with a bunch of filthy, furry animals.

As Aro left the house, the immortal child eventually coming into view, we all hissed and growled at the sight. Indeed, there was the said immortal child. It was a girl. I noticed something about this child. She looked familiar. Of course, none of the others noticed, but given my feelings for a certain newborn, brunette vampire, I saw the resemblance between her and this child.

Something was wrong here. This girl child….I saw Edward and Bella's faces in this child.

However, I soon got my answer……and I didn't like it at all.

Aro and the Cullens informed us of what had happened. Apparently the "vampires can't have children" rule only applies to us females. Males can impregnate human women. The child that was now before all the vampires and werewolves here was the result of such a union.

I slowly grasped what that meant.

Edward had impregnated a human Bella.

This child was Bella's biological child.

Edward and Bella had sex.

Edward and Bella had sex while Bella was still human.

As the pieces of my realization finally started coming together, so too did my remaining sanity rip to shreds. Edward had touched Bella whilst she was human! That baby was hers! I had to now look at the face that was the result of a sexual union between my Bella and that….Edward!

Finally, I couldn't take it anymore. I hissed and growled, desperately trying to suppress my rage. I lashed my gift out at any of the "witnesses" that were gathered. Not caring whether my gift hit the two remaining Romanians, the Amazons, the Egyptians, the Nomads, or other, I still lashed furiously.

And to my complete shock, my gift had no effect!

I remained confused and confounded for at least three minutes till I remembered something; Bella was immune to my gift. Was she responsible for this?

I looked at Bella, looked right at her to see if she might have been using her powers. She was. I was sure of it even then. She was projecting something that shielded the rest of them from my powers. She was a shield.

I wasn't sure whether I should feel completely grateful or not for this. If this was her power, then I'm sure that Aro would want her still around in hopes that she'd join the guard. On the other hand, this made making my gift being deadly very complicated.

My gift was obsolete not just towards Bella, but to everyone here that opposed us.

This could be a problem.

"_Alec," _I had mumbled to my brother, _"You DO see that don't you? My power has no effect on anyone here. I think it's Bella. She's the cause of this." _

Alec had looked between the two "armies" curiously, and soon he saw the same thing I did: an impact against something on the field. It looked like just a hit against air, but if one looked closer, they'd see that the "air" that my gift was impacting against was in fact Bella's shield which she had erected against us.

I could see Alec's eyes widen at the sight, and though he said nothing, I didn't need Edward's gift to know that what he was thinking was, _"We're in serious trouble."_

I wholly agreed. If my gift did nothing, would it be the same with Alec's? Would the witch twins' powers for once be proven useless?

My thoughts were once again interrupted as Aro, Caius and Marcus what our next decision would be. Caius, enraged that we had been mislead, called our witness Irina of the Denali coven forwards.

Understandably, she was afraid. She had been so sure of what she had seen. So sure that the Cullens had created an immortal child that she had been ready to condemn her dear friends to destruction. I smirk at that thought. Irina would have no sympathy from me today. I knew what it felt like too well to be betrayed by your friends, or at least the ones you thought were your friends.

Caius, interrogating Irina mercilessly, at some point actually hit her across the face hard. Irina should really be grateful that she wasn't human. That blow would have killed her, taken her head off. Caius held no strength back. Then again, he never did.

After beating Irina, she admitted her mistake. Apparently the very reason why she had put her "friends" in danger was because she wanted the werewolves destroyed. According to her, the werewolves killed a friend of hers.

Again, my smirk widened. Ah, so this whole thing was over her revenge. What a selfish little wretch. Then again, I really wasn't one to talk.

I knew what was coming already. As Caius sneered the question of whether or not Irina had any complaint left to say to the Cullens, I knew very well what Irina's fate was going to be.

I saw the metal object held by Caius, and I nearly grinned this time. That metal object was the signal to call for a vampire's doom. All the Volturi knew that metal object. We all knew what it meant.

I didn't need to do anything though, for as soon as Caius raised the object, Alexander, Frederick, Robert, Tomas and Daniel were all upon Irina, wrecking her to shreds. Caius opened the metal object to unleash the flames from it, incinerating the ripped apart pieces.

As the smoke plumed from Irina's ashes, I restrained my cackle of enjoyment. I glanced at the group of witnesses, or more specifically at Bella and saw that she had stiffened, her expression one of horror.

I cocked my eyebrow at this. Why so horrified? Irina had unleashed an army of well trained vampire warriors on Bella and her family, why was she so sympathetic? Now Tanya and Kate's reactions on the other hand, I was not surprised by.

Tanya and Kate were Irina's sisters, seeing their sister perish obviously set off their more vengeful nature.

In only a few seconds I realize that that was what Caius's true intention was! My eyes widened at this. Caius destroyed Irina so that the other side of the field would be triggered to attack. Caius was trying to spark outrage amongst our enemies.

Oh Caius, he truly was a ruthless creature.

Tanya and Kate were wrestled to the ground by the other vampires, restraining them from causing an all out war. How boring. The rest of the witnesses were clearly shaken by this action, not knowing what they could do.

Aro now went over the information that we had all learned. He was trying to find a way to continue to go after the Cullens. An excuse to infuriate them further. I was alright with that. Certainly.

Suddenly Garrett, the nomad, who I believe was around during the time of the American Patriots stepped forwards, speaking out against Aro. In a few minutes, Garrett had let out a speech of resistance towards my master's authority. Please let me hit him with my power, for the love of whatever god existed.

As Garrett finished the speech that he actually thought would have some affect on the other witnesses, Aro graced Garrett with an amused smile. Really, this vampire was a fool.

Slowly, more of the witnesses started to leave; the Egyptians, the two European Nomads.

I smirked again as I watched this. There was no chance for the Cullens. They would be destroyed, Bella would be forced to join us and I would be the one she'd look at, not Edward.

And the child? Yes, what to do about this tiny girl I wondered. What was this child's name again anyway? Rene….something, too long that I couldn't catch it. What would happen to her when we conquered the Cullens? Would Aro vote for her to live amongst the Volturi so that she could be of use to him later, or have her destroyed and just keep the child's parents? Preferably just Bella.

I almost sighed as I watched the witnesses. Such a ridiculous predicament for such powerful creatures as vampires. Who'd have ever thought that this mere puny human, later becoming a lowly newborn could cause this much trouble just by having a child and pull several groups of immortals into this type of situation?

During this time, several of us it seemed, not just me, wanted to see what our powers would do against Bella's shield. Chelsea sent her power out, trying to shred the emotional ties that the Cullens and their allies had together, unsuccessfully because of Bella's shield.

I sent my attack out, once again my powers impacted against Bella's shield and no one else. Anger once again replaced my determination. Bella…..damn it, the same thing I wanted more than anything else in the world and **she **was the very reason why we weren't winning at the moment.

I looked up at Bella, and her and my eyes met and I froze as I glared. Her lips pulled back, revealing her teeth in fierce defiance.

I growled once again. So this was Bella's form of bloodlust, it was aroused at the sight of coming battle. Wonderful, I'd have fun with her. I watched as Bella snarled more and more, her gleaming teeth bared now. I narrowed my eyes, however deep down I was excited. More excited than Felix usually was for battle. I wanted to see Bella with her newborn ferociousness. I wanted to see just how bloodthirsty she could be in battle.

I wanted to see the beauty of her ruthlessness.

My brother once again placed his hand on my shoulder, distracting me again from thoughts that I shouldn't be having. He then sent his own gift out towards Bella's shield.

I heard Bella whispering to Edward, _"Is Alec trying?" _

Edward nodded and mumbled, _"His gift is slower than Jane's. It creeps. It will touch us in a few seconds." _

Marcus voted for them to live, Aro was looking for a reason to persist, and Caius just wanted to attack, so while Alec was dismayed in seeing that his gift didn't work against Bella's shield either, our numbers were getting ready.

I made out some movement and realized that the family was getting ready to flee from us. We were about to commence another battle, when we were interrupted quite surprisingly.

"_Why don't you join us, Alice?" _Edward had called out loudly, yet calmly, as if he was completely assured now.

My head rose. Alice? The future seer? As soon as Edward had spoken, five new figures approached the battlefield. Two of them we all knew. It was Alice and her mate, that empath Jasper. They were leading. The next one was an Amazon, obviously she was a friend of the other two near Bella. The next two were other vampires, though the male that was coming was not moving as fast as the female.

The two new ones looked to be South American, I believe.

The rejoicing at Alice and Jasper's return was immediate; the elders Carlisle and Esme embraced the tiny future seer, Edward smiled widely, the small abomination giggled and tried to get Jasper to hold her, and Bella…..

Also immediately, all of us Volturi, including myself took advantage of this and tried to move in closer, hoping to see an opening in Bella's shield caused by her being distracted by Alice's return.

Hopefully Bella's joy at Alice coming back would give us the opening we'd need. However, Bella caught her mistake and went to making sure any holes she had in her shield were covered as Alec and I looked for them.

Again, I was barely restraining my grin. Ah, Bella, always surprising me pleasantly. Would she be this surprising when I took charge of her when we captured her?

For the umpteenth time my thoughts were interrupted as the female Hulien spoke. As she told us all about her sister, Pire and how she had met an "angel," which of course was translation for "vampire" and how Pire had died from the encounter, however she had not been fed on. Her death was the result of giving birth to her and the vampire's half vampire, half human son, Nahuel.

Nahuel stepped forwards to tell his own story.

As he spoke, I took this time to feign listening while looking at Bella, not caring anymore about evidence.

Why, why did this happen? Was fate so unfair? It's been a very, very long time since I've thought about fate. Literally at least fifteen or sixteen human life times. Yet here I was now at age 1612 and I was wondering why fate was so unfair. Surely I should know by now it just was unfair, nothing more.

Yet, after everything, I still wonder. My mother died giving birth to Alec and I, the whole village was cruel to us, tried to burn us to the stake, and just when Alec and I had gained power, every one of the vampire race treated us the same now as the human villagers did then. We were still the "witch twins," nothing more. And furthermore, after the Romanian wars we all lost Didyme and Alec and myself lost Marcus's father like guidance because he was lost without Didyme too.

Now this? I was finally in love. Me, the most vicious vampire in history, I'm sure, and I fell in love. Furthermore I fell in love with her while she was human, shockingly enough. And yet, I lost her as well, and she had a child now.

Seeing her now, smirking tauntingly at me…..toying with me, I realize that perhaps my fantasies of her taunting me and seducing me while blood dripped from her lips may not have been too far off.

She was taunting me now. Except as an enemy, not as a mate or lover.

Not the way I wanted her to.

Who would have ever thought they'd see the day? The great Jane Volturi who terrorized humans in both her human and vampire lifetimes and who was even infamous as an angel of torture amongst the vampire covens, forcing all vampire brutes to tremble in fear whenever I came into view, lusting and being in love.

Furthermore, the infamous Jane Volturi willing to go onto her knees and kiss this newborn's feet just for an understanding glance from the newborn.

And of course, from the looks of it, I wasn't even going to get that.

And she now even had the nerve to presently wear that necklace that I asked Aro to send to her for me. Once more, I could see the shine of the golf-sized diamond glinting at me as if teasing.

My thoughts were obviously unguarded, because the next thing I knew, Edward had gone from listening to Nahuel's story, to staring at me in disbelief, looking at me as if he didn't even recognize me.

I froze on the spot as I realized my thoughts were out now. Ah hell. Those golden eyes stared at me wide, that obnoxiously beautiful face for once confounded as it was towards me.

I was in deep trouble. Bella's mate knew what I wanted, knew what I desired. Knew I was unfit to be a weapon now.

I knew if it was possible, I'd have chills for all of eternity.

Well, there was no way around it now, was there? And given Edward's controlling nature of Bella, there was no need to worry that he'd tell her about my feelings, was there?

So then, there was no reason for me to keep it from Edward, was there?

_(So, you've finally found out, huh, Cullen?) _I taunted him mentally, _(I guess I can't hide it anymore. Ever since I saw her come and rescue your pitiful life from us, I've known that she was special. Even when you didn't. Oh, and I was the one that had Aro send that necklace. He didn't send it on his own. I had him send it.) _

I knew that he heard my thoughts. I knew, for as I thought them, he growled very clearly under his breath, now glaring as if he was hoping to burn holes in me. Bella turned her head to him, concerned, but said nothing.

_(Don't worry, Edward,) _I purred mentally, grinning, _(I'll take good care of her. Once you and your family have been destroyed, I'll take responsibility for her, and I'll take good care of the kid too.) _I added that last part, smirking at the half breed child, Renesmee.

Edward let out a roar that distracted everyone and he looked like he was about to attack when Bella's snap at him broke him out of his rage and he went back to just glaring at me.

I was able to prevent myself from teasing Edward further, and listened on as Nahuel concluded that we could go ahead and kill his biological father, Joham. Kill? Oh please, by all means, allow me to kill. I'm just itching to let my frustration out.

Aro calls for all of us to leave, we know we have to follow, no matter how much I wanted to remain and lash out further. I scowled and growled at them and vaguely made out Bella growling back behind us.

I occasionally looked back over my shoulder at the family and their allies and at Bella…and at her daughter.

It seemed like I had no hope…..ever.

The others looked at me but I said nothing as we moved. Aro began to explain what it was we were going to do about Joham. Whilst I almost always listen to Aro as if he's god, this time I took the opportunity to sneak away, a part of me wondering what the hell I was doing, the other part of me seeing that this might be my only chance to see Bella alone.

As I got closer to the Cullen home once again, Alec approached me from behind. I smelled and heard him of course before I saw him.

"_You wish to meet the girl that will be your doom, sister?" _Alec had asked, looking almost sympathetically at me.

I for once scowled at my brother, for once not grateful for his perception.

"_This is none of your concern, Alec. Leave Bella to me. You should only investigate if I don't come back soon. In the meantime Alec, listen to what Aro says and tell me the plan later." _I had said coolly and had headed towards the house again.

I rounded the house so that the wolves and the other vampire witnesses wouldn't detect me so easily. I overheard Bella cooing her daughter on the other side. I could smell Edward with Alice and Jasper and saw my opportunity.

I had ducked near the back of the house almost immediately seeing Bella and Renesmee. And that is where I am now, looking at the two of the currently.

"So, tell me, Jane," Bella spoke up suddenly, startling me, "What are you here for? Has your master not called his doggy back?"

If it was possible, I might have fallen right off the tree branch where I was perched in shock. Just how acute were Bella's senses of smell and hearing? Seeing that it was useless, I jumped down at the side of Bella and the child, catching the small toddler like girl's attention.

"Hi!" The child said, smiling happily and reaching for me, "Hi….Jane! Hello, Jane."

I cocked my eyebrow at this. This little freak certainly acted friendly to one of the vampires that had come earlier to kill her, wasn't she?

Noticing my look, Bella chuckled, "Don't think anything of it, Jane. She's friendly to everybody. Of course Edward and I have taught her such. Now what are you here for? To start a fight again? If Aro told you to back down, you're going against his orders little dog."

She finished, smiling cockily at me. I scowled. Obviously becoming a vampire had done wonders for her confidence. This was not the timid, frail human Bella I had partially been expecting.

"No, not at all, Bella," I said, smirking almost playfully, acting like it was a farce to show how truly cruel I really was, "Just came to check on you and your……interesting child."

Bella glanced back at Renesmee, who was now by her legs and stated, "Well, as you can see, we're fine." She turned back to me, still smirking and continued, "I know it's probably hard for you to imagine us being okay after a visit from the Volturi, but we're fine. Of course, can't say I'd say the same for you or Caius." Her smirk turned haughty.

I narrowed my eyes at her. For a moment, I was so surprised that I didn't say anything for a while. Bella's cockiness certainly startled me. "I just came to make sure that the girl is of no threat to our world." I stated, slowly drifting away from the two of them, "That's all."

Bella kept smiling as she said again, "As you can see, everything's fine. Now that you've seen that Renesmee is of no threat, you can be on your sadistic way. After all, irritating us is all you want, right?"

I almost stiffened at that.

_(No, it's you that I want, Bella!) _I thought to myself, trying to calm my anger and possessiveness down, _(It's you! Nothing else, Bella! I just want you.) _

"What I want is you." I wanted say more firmly and knowlingly than anything else, but I wisely kept my mouth closed.

"By the way," Bella said, looking at me, and even though my back was turned, I was able to detect her smirking once again, "That was very kind of you. Thank you for the necklace."

This time I really did freeze in my spot. What the hell? How did she…..? Was she suddenly the mind reader in the family or something?!

My blood red eyes widened in utter shock and I was unable to speak for almost a minute.

Bella's smile only widened. She continued, "You know, I never would have guessed it, Jane. But really, you could have told me sooner. I would have listened. I don't know how exactly it would have turned out, but you could have shared this little secret with me."

I looked to the ground, once again, I had the strangest feeling that if I could, I'd be blushing.

I was unable to stop myself from saying quietly, "I didn't want you to know. Jane Volturi is not weak. Jane Volturi is no useless weapon."

"Ah," Bella said, a chuckle in her voice, again for the umpteenth time, surprising me, "That's what it is. I'm so sorry that you're insulted that you're a weapon and that you feel things."

I was able to detect severe sarcasm in her statement.

I grunted slightly, but said nothing. After a few moments of Bella and Renesmee watching me, I finally spoke out again, "I don't know what else to say, Bella. You would have been better off joining the Volturi, though."

"Oh yes," Bella said, the sarcasm not even hidden this time, "And become a great weapon like you, Jane? How honorable an offer."

I sneered over my shoulder, taking one last look at mother and daughter, "You would have been better off joining the Volturi. I'd happily give you everything you'd want. Could Edward offer the same?"

Bella simply shrugged as she said, "He doesn't need to. Did you wonder how I found out that you were the one to give me the necklace, not Aro? It's simple. As you saw I can erect a mental shield, but I can also pull it back whenever I want so that Edward can read my mind."

I listened closely, while watching Bella, wondering where the hell she was going with this.

Seeing my perplexed look, Bella chuckled and continued, "To put it simply, Jane, I threatened to keep my mental shield up and never allow Edward to read my mind again unless he told me what he had found in your mind."

Again, I was floored. I never would have believed Bella could show such dominance in these types of things. This only made me want her more, unfortunately.

I was unable to say anything again. Look at me, the fierce Jane Volturi, unable to say anything for she is humbled by her shock of the strong will of her beloved.

Bella decided to answer anything further for me, "Maybe you're right, Jane. Maybe I'd be happier with the Volturi. Maybe not. I don't know. I'm happy now though. I'm happy about your feelings, Jane. You didn't have to hide them from me. However I can't feel them back for you. You can come back occasionally so long as you don't try to hurt my family, though."

I looked up, blinking at her in shock. What had she just said?!

Bella's smirk widened once again as she leaned down and scooped Renesmee up and walked back towards the house. As I watched, she looked over her shoulder one last time as she said, "Jane, you're sadistic, you're evil as far as I can tell, and I can't return your feelings, but I'm still happy that you loved me. I won't shun you when you come around again."

I stared, not quite believing my ears as Bella walked away, Renesmee waving 'bye' to me over her shoulder as they moved. I shook my head and fled back away from the house. I headed straight towards where by brother and the others were.

Joining Felix, Oliver and Aleera at the front, getting questioning looks from everyone, I scowled and concentrated ahead.

Smirking at me, Chelsea asked playfully, "Tell me, Jane, how was your visit to Bella?"

I scowled but said nothing, earning chuckles from the rest of the Volturi. My mind took me back to Didyme's love for Alec and myself, and I remembered seeing Bella with her own child Renesmee, and I remembered Bella's acceptance of my feelings.

For once, I really smiled at the extremely recent memory. Maybe an eternity of seeing Bella with Edward and a child wasn't so bad after all. That is, if she really didn't see me as a monster.

**Author's note:**

**Wow, on my computer it says that this story was 39 pages. Yikes. I had no idea I'd make it this long, even if it wasn't intentional. **

**Well that was my crack pairing fic. Hope you enjoyed it. None of these characters are mine. They're all Stephanie Meyer's. I only own this ridiculous fic. **

**Again, blame this pairing fic on me eating bad food. That's it, I ate some rotten food without realizing it and it's affecting my brain. That's what explains this fic.**


	2. Bella Selfish

**What I Want Is You: Chapter Two:**

**Bella's POV:**

I could come up with a million reasons why this wasn't right. A million. I was always nothing except normal. I never saw myself as anything else. The only time I felt more than human, more than normal was when Edward looked at me. The only time I felt I was more than just a speck of human life was when he held me and looked at me as if I was the most important thing in the world to him. Not even my time spent with Renee or Charlie made me feel that way. Edward was the world to me.

At least that's how I always thought it would be. How could I think that it would be any other way? But it was, shockingly.

The moment I moved back to Forks and met Edward, I was sure that it was with him that I belonged. I was sure that I had found my place. He treated me with what I thought was understanding, made me feel, at the time that I was special. Not just a normal human to be killed and drained by the vampire race. He treated me as if I was treasure, not just food.

Edward, who blessed me with our beautiful daughter Renesmee, brought me the most happiness anyone could ask for. After I gave birth to Renesmee, the process nearly killing me, Edward saw he had no choice. As a vampire now, I have everything any woman could ask for. I have a beautiful, loving daughter, a family, a wonderful, handsome, intellectual and doting husband and forever to spend it with.

But something is wrong. It's not enough.

When Jacob Black, the werewolf, or wolf shape-shifter as our family found out and Edward challenged one another for me, I thought I had shown all the selfishness I could feel. And I _was _selfish. I couldn't stop wanting both of their presences in my life, no matter how much I hurt either of them. Jacob had been given a second chance at love while I was being changed by Edward.

Despite the fact that I don't have blood anymore the thought still makes me boil. Renesmee is _my _daughter. I had just given birth to her and Jacob had…..

I know I shouldn't think about it, unless I want to cause problems for the whole family. My daughter's happy after all. She loves Jacob. Even if she's not so much as four years old, she's growing into a young, beautiful sixteen year old girl even as I'm thinking about this. Ugh, that's another thing I have to think about. My daughter hasn't even spent an actual childhood with me. I give birth to her and the first thing that happens is her becoming the imprintee of some dismayed, pathetic wolf-shifter and I don't even have seven actual years to spend teaching her about the world.

I know how ungrateful I am. I know full well that I'm the most selfish, ungrateful person, whether a human or vampire that's ever existed. I never stop wanting, I know that as well. Even now when I have everything, I still want all the time there could be with my daughter. Given that I was turned into a vampire, I'm lucky I have a daughter at all.

But still it's not enough. All the time that I had with Edward, the human years and vampire years that were spent with him feels empty now. I had only thought I had had happiness with him.

I had the ideal life, even though I was a vampire and I still couldn't be satisfied. Edward, in my mind, three years ago was perfect, yet I want…..I want a thing like…_her._

Despite any possibility of me being unhappy with Edward, wouldn't being with him be better than _this_? Wouldn't gaining happiness with Edward be far better than this? Than what I've been doing for almost four years now?

With Edward at least it's understandable. He actually has morals. This sadistic creature has none. She tortures both humans and vampires, drains humans, helps her power-hungry coven pillage other vampire covens and nearly did the same to my family four years ago.

Four years back when my daughter was first getting used to the world, learning the politics of the vampire world as a human newborn would learn the alphabet, first, even before that, learning the name of her family members and future husband. Strangely, no matter how much I think of Jacob in that light for my daughter, I still can't bring it to my mind without becoming disgusted.

But back to the issue at hand. This other, this deadly vampire had come along with the Volturi to destroy my family due to their paranoia. So certain that we Cullens would be a threat to their own coven, they took advantage of the rumor about an immortal child. Acting on paranoia, just so that they had an excuse to destroy what they _believed _to be a threat is heinous enough in my opinion, but for one of the Volturi to be sadistic and enjoy inflicting pain on her victims…I can't begin to say how sickening that is to me.

Despite how much of a hypocrite I am.

No matter how horrified I am, due to witnessing the Volturi's actions or heractions as a one of them, terrorizing covens into submission.

But even if I ever come to the realization that I lack morals due to having such feelings for her, it doesn't compare with how ashamed I am that I excuse myself and my actions with Edward's arrogance. Arrogance doesn't automatically trigger cheating on someone and actually, quite possibly even considering switching sides.

No matter how pious Edward acts, it doesn't give me the right to constantly cheat on him and endanger my family, including my own daughter. Yet I do. All the time. Every time she comes here…..

Edward…..he acted so superior…there were times when I wondered if I would actually be happy to see _her _torture him. That smug smile that came onto his face when he was sure that he was making the right decision _for _me. He somehow makes me feel uncomfortable, and yet I mistook it for love. But even so, whatever Edward's faults, I shouldn't be allowing _her _to touch me.

I shouldn't allow this to keep happening, but I always do. Always allow her hands to wander over me, always allow her to kiss my throat, holding it tightly so I can't move. She is what I never want to become, what I hate.

Yet I bend to her every time she's here.

She is beautiful, in her own innocently disturbing way. You would probably mistake her for an angel. She and her brother. The twins of torture. Treated horribly by their human village before being changed by Aro, the leader of the vampire world. Together they made the Volturi legendary for their merciless nature.

I always told myself that the Volturi were evil, and that they were power-hungry. But hearing what Jane tells me every time she's here, tells me about all the different Volturi members and what they're like when not watched by outsiders, I really start to wonder.

Jane has told me about the Volturi members. All of them. Every time she comes to Forks, evading the Cullen coven's surveillance and comes to me, knowing I will keep her presence a secret, she gives me bits and pieces of information about her Volturi family and their system.

With each time she approaches, with that coy smile and those intrusive intentions, she tells me about all of the Volturi. Visit by visit, I learn about how close Jane is with her fellow guards and "brothers," Afton, Felix and Demitri. I learn how much of softies several of the Volturi are when they aren't out condemning those that have broken the law. I almost feel light hearted when Jane tells me stories of how she and the other Volturi members act around each other when they're not being watched. I very nearly smile at the thought of Jane being picked up by Felix and tossed up and down like a big brother would do for a little sister.

The Volturi sounded close. I hated to admit it but they actually sounded closer than some members of my current Cullen family.

I watch Jane's dangerous red eyes soften as she speaks about her coven, thinking over each one of them as she describes them to me. With each Volturi member she tells me about, I find myself more and more surprised. I think to myself that I could never imagine Caius as a tolerant father or Corin, Afton and Chelsea as worrisome, loving siblings, or Demitri as a playful older brother or Heidi as a considerate, overprotective sister.

I had labeled each Volturi member in my mind before Jane's visits started, and these labels weren't flattering. I imagined Aro, Caius and Marcus as ruthless, manipulative warmongers. I had labeled Demitri as a cold hunter with no consideration for others. It didn't help that he was a tracker, similar to the psychotic James who had been the first vampire to ever try to prey on me. I had labeled Felix as a violent monster and Heidi as the bait for human tourists to come to the Volturi tower to meet their grizzly doom.

Hell knows I had plenty of grim ways of looking at Jane herself and her brother Alec. Jane told me herself what had almost happened to her and Alec, the hatred that the human race had cast upon them when they were so young. And that had been when the twins were still human, never mind any vampire powers added. I listen to everything Jane says whenever she comes here and my now undead, no longer beating heart hurts for her. To be mistreated by your own species sounds terrible.

As a vampire now my memories of my human life aren't as sharp as they used to be, but I remember how cruel the human children were towards me just because I was different and clumsy. Watch stupid and klutzy Bella swagger into the classroom. Yeah, that was me. I was just the laughingstock of human children in the Arizona, Phoenix kindergarten. I know very well how cruel humans can be. But the pain that I experienced couldn't come close to the pain that was inflicted on these two vampires while they were human. The prejudice that was held against them just because they were different and their mother died giving birth to them. They were hated for something that they couldn't help. Jane elaborated about how she and Alec were so roughly tied against wooden posts, watching in horror as the village people gathered dry bushels of hay at the twins' feet to burn.

Every moment I've experienced after she told me that, I've spent pondering to myself and clenching my fists together at the thought of their torment.

When Jane teased me, bothering me about the most annoying of things involving the Cullens, I just want to throttle her. Of course now that I'm a vampire I really _can _do that, I just would only want to temporarily. When I'd get to it, I know that I really wouldn't want to. And you know, wrong as our relationship is, as much aggravation as I feel when she teases me and sneers about the vegetarian lifestyle we have, it actually makes me feel endearment. The fact that it's Jane doing it to me and not Edward brings a thrill through me each time she arrives here that I'm worried I might end up revealing everything to my dear family.

We share things together, Jane and I. We talk about our different families. So when Jane heard that Emmett once tried to jump me as payback for beating him at arm wrestling, a quite frightening look came over her face as she growled at the thought. I calmed her down a little, as she grunted something about dismembering him when she had the chance. I still have to stop my laughter as I remember her look when I playfully asked what she was going to do, bite at Emmett's ankles.

Naturally, Jane scowled at me, her eyebrows narrowed.

I've also told her about Jacob and Renesmee. Jane's reactions were priceless. I still think about the roar that came from her mouth when I told her. There are still marks on the wooden floor of the cottage where she clawed it after she thought about their relationship. The only explanation I had for Edward when he asked me about the damaged floor was that I done it myself when I had had a "newborn vampire" moment.

I don't dare tell Jane that Jacob once forced me to kiss him. I can just imagine the results of that.

For some reason, the thought of Jane actually becoming murderous over my daughter being imprinted on as soon as she was born was somewhat charming to me. I told myself after Jane left that the reason for that mistaken reaction from me was because I was still bitter about it. Wouldn't every mother get disturbed at finding out that their daughter was claimed immediately after birth? By a man that is seventeen years older than the said newborn daughter no less.

I told and reassured myself that it was only rational how I was behaving whenever Jane came to me. I was still recovering from the transition between human and vampire and from seeing my only daughter fall in love with a wolf-shifter I used to have feelings for. It was disturbing enough that Jacob had forced me into a kiss once, but to think that that kind of person was who Renesmee was going to be relying on for the rest of her life…..I still am rather unnerved.

I've watched him with her as she experiences her "teenage years" in only actual four years and he seems under control. I desperately wish for my mind to go blank when I wander into thoughts about how he's going to act in the bedroom…..ugh, I can't even stomach that thought. It's a good thing vampires can't barf out their victims' blood, otherwise I'd be doing just that right now.

As for how I get around Edward's mind reading ability, it's simple. Edward isn't like Aro. Aro can see every memory you've ever had just by touching your hand. If I let my mental shield down, his powers would work for me too. However, Edward doesn't have the same power as Aro. Edward can only read current thoughts you think up. Only contemporary thoughts that come to one's mind, instead of seeing all your memories. Edward would not be able to see that Jane had continually come here without consent or warning. Furthermore, he couldn't possibly imagine what Jane and I had done together one these visits.

If Edward had the exact power Aro had, then Jane and I would have been caught a long time ago, so long as I let my mental shield down. Thankfully, I had married someone who was as capable of mind reading as a log is.

Ah, that was another issue here. My marriage to Edward. Jane, whenever she's here, occasionally glances at the ring on my finger that Edward bestowed on me after Victoria brought her newborn army. She says nothing when she does, but I get the feeling that if she kept staring at the ring, she would eventually growl hatefully. She has already made it beyond clear how much she despises Edward _and _my decision to marry him.

I recall her actually circling her pale fingers around the metal of the ring, and I couldn't help but wonder if she would have crushed the ring, were it not for the fact that it was on my finger. Again, the more disturbing aspect of this arrangement between the two of us is that I strictly now see her temper as an endearment, not a threat like I should. Everything about her seems to warm my dead heart. Even her creepiest moments I find no longer scare me. They only make me laugh nowadays.

Hmm, Edward always said I lacked self-preservation. Maybe that wasn't as hard to believe as before. Maybe I carried it with me to my next life as a vampire. What little sense I might have had as a human towards her is now gone. It might have something to do with me feeling so cocky with this shield of mine.

I'm not stupid when it comes to Jane's power, though. I don't under any circumstances want to feel it again. Yes, again. I actually asked Jane to use her power on me as I lowered my shield. What? I was curious.

I still can't help but smile at the thought of how Jane looked when I asked her to use her powers on me. I saw how worried she was. She could act as cold and tough as she wanted but nothing could hide the fear in her eyes when I asked her. I had wondered why she looked afraid for a few minutes. After all, her power wasn't physical, it couldn't actually hurt me literally. However, I came to the realization that Jane was afraid that I might become afraid of her after she used the power on me. That thought only makes my smile widen. She really was much more sensitive than she acted.

I promised her I could never be afraid of her, no matter what pain she put me through.

I could have sworn after I told her that, that I saw a hopeful look in her eyes, but even now, with my perfect vampire memory, I can't be sure. I know that she hopes to gain my affections, quite possibly even my love, but I'm not a mind reader like Edward or Aro. I can't tell what she's thinking. And a part of me is really grateful for that.

Somehow I have the feeling her mind would be a scary thing to read.

I let my shield down and as soon as I did, I felt Jane's gift seep into me mentally. Oh god, I can't begin to tell you how painful it was. I was on the ground writhing, a scream nearly being ripped from me, that is till Jane stopped. Almost as soon as the pain had come, it had gone and I was left looking in confusion at a vampire that seemed like she was about to burst into tears if that was possible for our species.

Her words still make me feel more pain than that gift she has did.

"Don't ask me to do that ever again, Bella." She had said, agony in her eyes. Due to her request, I never asked her to use her gift on me again. Still, her pain shocks me. Do I really mean that much to her? I had lived throughout the vampire world for four years, six if you want to include the two I spent as a human with the knowledge that vampires existed, and yet never have I ever seen one outside of Edward, Alice and Esme look at me with such a torn expression.

Jane…..I knew I meant something special to her, but I just didn't know how deeply she felt for me. I suspected it, but not to this level. And there are times when I seriously wonder what she is willing to do for me in comparison to what Edward has done.

I know Edward loves me. I know, in his own strangely obsessive way he does. But the question I have now, is will that be enough for me anymore? And that brings me back to my selfishness. I'm truly a selfish monster. I've known that for a long time. Ever since I first got involved with Jacob after the Cullens left after my birthday, I've known full well how selfish I am. What's happened for four years has only confirmed the fear I have of how inconsiderate I've been.

It's not enough that I have a loving husband, a great family and a beautiful daughter and being a beautiful immortal, but I have to have Jane's devotion as well?

Today, as I watch my vampire family talk, laughing playfully as they discuss the events of entering yet another school semester tomorrow. I find myself unable to prevent my joy from coming out in powerful waves, and I'm more than sure that Jasper can feel it. My blond older brother looked over his shoulder at me and smirked. Yep, Jasper had felt that. I'm happy here with my family. I shouldn't think otherwise.

I've been able to hid Jane's visits surprisingly easily.

Edward can only read the thoughts that I allow him to read. Jasper feels my emotions but he doesn't know the reason behind the emotions. Now Alice, she is the problem. I had to think up a bunch of different random scenarios so that Alice would see the wrong thing instead of me meeting up with Jane every time she came around. A part of me still wonders if Alice really knows nothing.

There are times when Alice looks at me knowingly but says nothing. She just watches me calmly, but not a word comes from her mouth when she does this. I know Alice loves me like she does the rest of her family. I'm her beloved sister, and she wouldn't do anything to hurt me or endanger me, yet I know how it would kill her if she ever actually found out that I was unfaithful to her brother.

I still occasionally feel her looking at me, still not saying a word about what I suspect she's seen. I wonder, just how much could I mean to her if she's willing to keep her mouth and mind closed to Edward? She's willing to keep this a secret, despite how much time she's spent with Edward and the rest of the family for a number of decades. I can't begin to tell her how grateful I am to her for that.

I realize within these moments of contemplation that whatever I do with Jane, it will probably be forgiven. Still, it doesn't stop the wrenching pain I feel every time I lie to Carlisle and Esme that I love Edward, or the guilt that comes with laughing at Edward with Emmett whenever the two of us play a prank on him, and it feels like I'm doing more than just pulling a prank on him as I think of my activities with Jane.

It still seems like the most disgusting thing imaginable. After everything Edward and I have been through together, I bend to Jane. After surviving James's attack, Edward leaving, the Volturi almost killing us and Alice, Victoria raising her newborn army, me almost dying while giving birth to Renesmee, and the Volturi almost killing us again, that I would be so disloyal to him, after everything he's been ready to sacrifice for me.

And what would Renesmee think if she ever were to find out what exactly her mommy and the "mean Volturi lady," as she calls Jane, do together? How terrible would that be for her? To find out that her beloved parents aren't really happy together….or rather that her mother isn't happy with her father? How much of a trauma will it be if she finds out that her mother is having sex with one of the vampires that tried to murder her four years ago?

She was so afraid for her family when the Volturi came. The memory of her looking at us fearfully when Aro entered the house to look at her still fills me with dread. Never will I want that man within a 7000 mile radius of my daughter ever again. Aro is a psychopath. That I'm sure of. And Jane? How was she much more sane than Aro? Actually, she isn't at all, which makes what I'm doing all the more lowly.

The Volturi had come with the intention of killing us all, if not controlling us in the end. Who knows what the result would have been for Renesmee if they had gotten their hands on her. Jane's intentions were not different from the rest of theirs. If it weren't for the fact that Renesmee was capable of projecting images of her memories into others' minds, and as a result Aro realized what exactly she was, they would have killed her. Again, Jane would have been no different. She would have been right there committing the slaughter along with the rest of them.

I could never love a monster like her. How could I when I had a deep and good man like Edward?

I knew how hard it was for him when he consented to my pleas that he change me into a vampire, how much it went against his beliefs and religion. I saw that I caused him pain because he thought he was dooming my soul, but I didn't care. I loved him enough to make myself a vampire for him…but he didn't love me enough to change me into a vampire without me doing what he wanted first.

It's come to a point where I'm not sure how much longer I can love him. Now it seems as if I don't care how much I'm going to hurt him. All that appears to matter to me is Jane. Jane is the one that has given me everything without question. I know that if I had asked Jane when I was human to change me into a vampire, she'd do it in less than a second. She wouldn't agonize over it again and again like Edward always did.

Jane is an evil vampire, there's no way around that fact. Edward might as well have invented some of the morals that people believe nowadays, he's so pious. Yet, despite all of their obvious differences, I find myself constantly comparing. And wondering just how much of a better deal exactly did I get by being with Edward? I know how dark Jane is, I know, but I really ponder if that's enough reason to stay away from her. I know what her feelings are for me. No matter how much I deny it, I know how she feels about me. It brings me back to a question of whether or not pure evil can love. But then there's a question that I never thought about. Can pure good love either?

Edward was so absorbed in his beliefs and deluding himself into thinking me innocent that he never thought about what I wanted. So that brings about a question: did he even love me in the first place?

No matter what reasoning or pleading I displayed to my so called love, Edward always, in his arrogant fashion kept me from what I wanted. What exactly he accomplished in his self righteous beliefs, I'll never know, but I've come to wonder at the end now if it was worth it. The family that I'm with now of course is worth it, and Jane is….Jane is worth it, but is Edward?

I had thought my life started when I met Edward. I'm more than sure now that I was wrong. No, I now love the darker one of the witch twins. Whether I like it or not, I do truly love Jane. I felt pain for what happened to Jane and her brother while they were still human at the hands of the villagers. That was reasonable, it was a descent thing to feel for her. But the extent of which I was hating those that tried to murder her was almost unbelievable.

It was too much, even for me.

That's when I knew….

When we first truly confronted each other on the battlefield, or more appropriately, the Cullens' property, with her alongside the Volturi and me with the Cullen coven and the rest of the vampires from around the world after my daughter was born, I had first suspected what my feelings for her were. And what the intensity of them was like.

The look in her blood red eyes when she first saw me as a newborn was amazing. She looked as if she was seeing a completely different creature from a vampire. I sometimes wonder if she still sees me that way, even as we intimately get to know one another. I recall, and still chuckle at her expressions when I told her about all the mishaps my mother, Renee caused in the kitchen, how hair brained she was.

When I told her all of this, Jane, at the end actually smiled.

I had seen her smile before, just not like this. I had seen that cruel smirk as she tortured her victims, the evil glinting in her eyes as she relished their pain. The smile that I was bestowed me with, was not anything like that. It was a real smile. One that I found softened me.

I tell myself over and over again, deny that Jane has come to mean so much to me, but in the end I know it's for naught. Jane might really be one of the few vampires besides Renesmee, Carlisle, Esme, Alice and the family that have ever meant anything to me. And do you know the worst part? When she tells me things about the Volturi, how much they care about each other, despite what the Cullens have told me about them, I almost feel tempted to join them.

Not that it would be the first time. When I first met Jane and the rest of the Volturi, when Edward tried to kill himself, that was the first time I actually considered treachery to the Cullens. Aro offered me a place in his guard, and I seriously entertained the possibility. At that moment, I felt all vampire eyes, including Alice's and Edward's on me, and I had considered. When I thought about it, why not? Why shouldn't I leave the Cullen family? They had left me after all.

And given the way Jane had looked at me, even then when we first met, I see now that I didn't have much other reason to refuse.

Even now, Jane whispers things to me during her visits. Trying to entice me and get me to join her coven. Her words unsettling me more and more with each visit.

"Just think what we could be together," She says to me heatedly as she pins me to a moss covered tree, her hands dangerously close to my thighs, "Just think about what your place could be in the Volturi ranks. We would all see you with the utmost respect. You would be Felix, Demitri, Afton, Corin, Chelsea, Santiago, Heidi, and everyone else's sister. Aro, Marcus and even Caius would love to have you with us.

"Why bother refusing us when you could have everything? You could have a kingdom at your fingertips if you just joined us. And Jacob Black? You despise him because he imprinted on your daughter don't you? We, the Volturi will slaughter all of the wolves for you, including Jacob. Your daughter won't be claimed by anyone but you ever again, Bella, if you just join us. We could kill Jacob. _My _power would be at your fingertips as well if you became my mate."

That last two eerie parts of Jane's offer seems to affect me the most. Jacob Black killed? Now that _would _be tempting. Just thinking of the possibility of the creep that claimed my little girl as soon as she was born, protecting Renesmee's innocence seemed like such an appealing offer. I almost gave in right there at hearing that. Jacob Black, I knew was not to be trusted. He showed signs of being an aggressive, even abusive boyfriend and the fact that he literally claimed my daughter didn't help my impression of him. I almost gave in at the thought of ripping him apart. Almost.

But the second part of what she said was nearly worse to an extent.

What she said, "_My _power would be at your fingertips as well if you became my mate."

What Jane said might have been subtle under certain content, but I understood the meaning behind her words. If I became her mate, all I'd have to do is say the word and Jane would use her torturous powers at my command. And her power would be mine through her, so long as I became her mate. The thought both makes me curious and even more afraid.

The thought of Jane's power, that terrible gift at _my _disposal, the thought of Jane's evil gift being used indirectly under me was terrifying. How could I even consider…..and yet I did. I should be condemned for eternity just like Edward always thought I would be for so much as being tempted at the thought of what Jane offered. She is sadistic and immoral, and I might actually love her and want to use her powers? I'm truly a selfish, evil creature.

What's worse is that I've seen plenty of just what Jane can do with that power. I saw what she did to that poor newborn, Bree Tanner. Tortured her mercilessly and sadistically, and then had Felix murder her. They claimed that they were upholding the law, and yet a part of me knew that they were doing it just because they could. They just didn't care who was responsible.

I scowl at Jane around those times, saying nothing, but she knows, without having to have any mind reading powers what I'm thinking. And at seeing my scowl, she simply smirks in arrogance.

"I won't join you." Is the usual response I give, to restrain any further anger towards her and her coven.

"Of course you won't," Is what she states after I say this, behind smirking lips, "For now, anyway."

I tend to glare harder at her, or as hard as I can possibly glare, watching as she flits away, giggling in amusement while looking over her shoulder at me, grinning.

I tell myself whenever she leaves that I won that round, but the masochistic part of it is that I loathe myself even after I see her leave. I can't stand myself because despite everything, despite that Jane is a monster and her coven are power hungry and manipulative beasts that have no mercy, I realize that I don't care. All that matters is my own selfish desires.

Jane's even more arrogant than Edward, has less of a conscience than him, is sadistic and monstrous, almost pure evil, and in the end I know what I feel for her. In the end, I know that I feel for her, what I can never ever feel for Edward.

I love her.

**Author's Note:**

Well, I'm not sure this chapter was quite as powerful as the previous one, but I'm hoping that it at least captured some of a Jane and Bella relationship.


End file.
